Tales From A Broad

My year of teaching English in Japan is up. Next mission: backpack Asia before going home to the U.S.A. Currently HOME!

How to Get Held Hostage by a Ramen Shop Owner: for Dummies

"My fork sucks! Let us out!"

Evidently, it's as easy as callin him/her a cunt. How do I know? Well....

After our monthly required meetings at Yamaguchi city, a group of us were on the prowl for a restaurant to hang out in, ANY restaurant. After hunting for 30 minutes or so, we finally laid eyes on a ramen shop. Naturally, we go in and I decide to use the bathroom before we get settled. Once I finished and headed out to meet up with everyone else, I see that the only person inside was Paul...Paul being pulled by the shop owner.

An old fogie in his sixties restraining Paul (over 6 ft, big guy) by his bag. The closer I get, the more I see how furious the guy was. Yelling, shaking and, at this point, holding both of us back...we couldn't break free from him. We were held captive! I couldn't understand a word he was saying (or what was going on for that matter). Thank Gawd Paul managed to push his way through and out the door. Now I was held captive, Mario Brothers style. Paul was trying to save me from King Koopa in his dreadful castle. Seeing me completely hopeless against this senile man, Paul forces the door open, despite grandpa's attempts. We were apologizing profusely in our broken Japanese, a feeble attempt at bargaining with him to let BOTH of us out. Until finally, the only customer in the store wanted to leave and had to pay. Perfect distraction. In a split second, Paul and I look at each other and make a run for it. We were actually scared! I've never seen a Japanese person lose face like that, let alone get aggressive..

We ran to meet up with everyone and try to explain what had happened. After a while, Stephanie (slightly inebriated at this point, mind you) confesses to calling the guy a cunt because, "He said he wouldn't serve us. So, I asked him 'do you really not want to serve us or are you just too much of a cunt to understand my Japanese?'" I could've killed her, but it does make for a good laugh...
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At 23:57, Blogger goongirl said...

I just hate being told I am not speaking Japanese when I damn well am. He understood, he was just a racist fucker. Sorry to have put you in that situation.    

At 06:51, Blogger boredatwork said...

Next time you need to flush the toilet when you use a public bathroom. That'll piss off anybody.    

At 22:22, Blogger E said...

haha, nice story! but you really should have busted out your ketai and snapped a photo!    

At 01:57, Blogger Cee Pee said...

I woulda loved to have some evidence like a pic, but I didnt wanna get decapitated with this guy's chopsticks. I was scurred.

BTW Steph, no worries...you gave me one of my most memorable experiences in Japan thus far.    

At 03:26, Blogger goongirl said...

mate I had no idea he would react like that because swearing in Japanese is much more subtle. Like in engrish we'd say "Fuck you! You racist cunt". Sorry again. m_m    

At 20:36, Blogger Mo said...

NO WAY!! hahahaha......how I wish i could get my hands on that surveillance footage    

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